On City Life

We've been talking a lot lately about where we're going to live in the next 1 to 5 years.... how long we'll be in the city, where we'll move when we make the Big Decision to leave, what Ronan's social and school life will be like in the city vs. the suburbs, and what are the important elements of life that we'd like to expose him to. One of our desires (for right now, at least) is to send him to public school, which means we'd like to live in an area where the public school system is really great! Both C and I went through public schools in LA and Oakland, respectively, and we both had mixed experiences: a few excellent teachers, many hard-working kids, resources that were just okay. There were definite challenges in our schools, yes, but we both feel the benefits were significant. We learned how to interact with people from all kinds of backgrounds, we learned about life in the real world (and life is often tough), and we learned that you have to work hard to get what you want. It's true that once we both hit Dartmouth we felt inadequately prepared (academically, not intellectually) next to our prep school classmates, but we figured out how to close the gaps. Almost 10 years later, we're both really proud of what we're doing with our Dartmouth educations! And we know a lot of other "public school success stories."

Now that we're raising our little guy, it's tempting for us to say "Private school all the way! He's getting everything we didn't have!" But I wouldn't want him to lose out on meeting people from all walks of life early on, of growing up with a diverse group of kids who weren't necessarily Ivy League-bound (or college-bound for that matter) but who represented equally interesting and engaging parts of American life. I guess I'm saying that diversity is key, no matter what kind of school he goes to, because for C & I, understanding people and learning to communicate effectively across groups has been instrumental in our personal and professional lives. If we stay in SF, diversity won't be hard to find. I just worry that if we move to the suburbs, will our life lose the variety? Will we be surrounded by upper-middle class everything? Will the only people next to us in restaurants be just like us and will they all drive home in BMWs? (Wait, is that us already, right now?! Yikes.) Maybe our fear is suburban homogeneity and maybe this fear is completely unfounded. Nevertheless, it's on our minds now as we shop for houses in SF and on the Peninsula.

Our date night last week consisted of a very nice dinner at The Last Supper Club, in the Mission, followed by sundaes at Ghiradelli Square. At dinner, we pondered this question: is there a place like The Last Supper Club in, say, Palo Alto or Menlo Park? A place that serves innovative food in a stylish setting in a mixed neighborhood to a completely diverse clientele? There were people in their 50s and 60s to our left, and a pack of 20-something hipsters in front of us. Do you necessarily lose this mix and vibe when you leave the city? Is it replaced by other mixes and vibes that are just as interesting, just different? Will there come a time (and have we already reached it?) when the "edge" of city life is less important to us?

So, I visited an SF preschool today that surprised me. Despite its location in a church recreation area, with no yard, next to a construction site, on a busy city street (so anti-suburbian!), it had the essence of what I think we're looking for in a school... Dedicated teachers, happy students from many backgrounds, a serious approach to taking care of kids, a clean and stimulating environment, and visible displays of love and support. Though we can't quite picture Ronan in school yet, we think we'll get accepted to this school and we think we'll try it out this fall. How's that for toddler city life?